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April 2011


my (our) books

Fool for Love When You Don't See Me

Someone Like You I'm Your Man

He's The One It Had To Be You

The Mammoth Book of New Gay Erotica Best Gay Erotica 2007

Best Gay Love Stories: New York City Best Gay Love Stories 2005

Three Fortunes In One Cookie The Deal


If you have any of the above books and would like them signed, mail them to:

P.O. Box 131845, Houston, TX., 77219.

Please include three dollars for return postage.

Send email to timothyjlambert@gmail.com

Warning: This blog may contain homosexuals which in the states of California and Maine have been alleged to destroy the sanctity of marriage. Read at your own risk.


recommended courses of action

Scout's Honor Rescue is an all-breed, no-kill, Not-For-Profit 501(c)(3) animal rescue organization committed to bringing courage, character and compassion to Houston's homeless pet population and making a positive difference in the lives of these stray and abandoned animals and the Houston community as a whole. 100% of every dollar donated goes directly to saving the life of a homeless animal.

Scouts Honor Rescue Inc.

locally known


maine AIDS alliance

global AIDS alliance


AIDS foundation houston

bering omega community services

frannie peabody center

Timothy's hair by Larry Henderson Hair Design.

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the mob rules

Rex and I went to the dog park today (Thursday). I'll admit that I'm not a huge fan of dog parks. There are a few reasons why I feel that way, one of them being that other people bring their dogs to the park and those people aren't me. People who aren't me get on my nerves sometimes. Also, lots of strange dogs in an enclosed area begs for a dog fight. But, what are you going to do if you have a dog in the city? Dogs need exercise, and for those of us with dogs who think it's hilarious to play You Can't Catch Me Because I Can Run Faster a dog park with a high fence is a vital necessity.

Because I'm me, and not one of those people who aren't me, I play by all the rules of the dog park. I'm mindful of my dog and try to stay nearby in case he decides to antagonize the obligatory pit bull. (And he did today. He humped that pit bull like tomorrow might never come. I was so proud.) I bring Rex's vaccination and rabies paperwork with me. I never bring food or treats with me. I have Rex's leash handy at all times. And if he snaps at another dog, we're out of there. One thing I'm always aware of is my nearly empty checking account. Any dog who inflicts injury on a person or another dog at our dog park is legally and financially responsible. I may a responsible dog owner, but I don't want to be that responsible. Because I'm not known for being financially responsible, if Rex were to cause someone bodily harm, I may as well spread gravy on my throat and offer myself to the obligatory pit bull.

Bearing that in mind, I was infuriated at the dog park today when a woman and her two small children entered the park. Apparently this mother thinks it's a wonderful idea to go to dog parks so her children can play with strange dogs. NOT A GOOD IDEA! They didn't even have a dog with them. I overheard someone ask if they owned a dog, or were planning to get one, and the mother said no. I suppose she thinks if they visit dog parks that will pacify her children's want for a dog. From what I saw today, when her children get bitten or mauled by a strange dog, that will end any want for a dog they might ever have.

The two children were young, a boy and girl. I'd guess their ages to be four and nine, respectively. They both ran into the park ahead of their mother and were, of course, surrounded by dogs immediately. Dogs don't see children and think, Oh, look. Two young children have entered the dog park. They think, Oh, look. Two strange animals have entered this crazy pack. The young girl immediately shrieked, drew back, and raised her hands above her head. Not good. That sort of move could be interpreted by a strange dog as aggression. Or, it could be interpreted as an invitation to play, which could cause harm to the child if the dog's paws slapped or scratched up her little face. The young boy, being the smaller of the two, went for the smaller dogs in a fashion that imitated Godzilla approaching Tokyo. Seeing this, I immediately called Rex to me and grabbed his collar.

Rex came to me from a home with very young children and I have every reason to believe he'd never harm one. However, they were his children and part of his pack. I've no idea how he'd behave around other people's young beasts. And since he's of the rambunctious sort, I didn't want to chance anything. Which was a good call, because the two young children began to run around, yanking dog tails and petting every dog in sight. And it looked like they petted hard. I imagined one of them grabbing Rex's tail, and Rex whipping his head around and sinking his teeth in their hand.

While all this was happening, the mother was wandering behind them and saying things like, "Don't pull their tails, okay?" Or, "Don't run, okay?" These requests were in a tone of voice that would have made Marilyn Monroe sound like a drill sergent. A dog owner next to me muttered, "I don't advocate child abuse, but I want her to spank them. Now." A few other dog owners next to us agreed in low tones, and it was then that I realized I wasn't the only one hanging on to my dog. A woman freely admitted that her dog didn't like kids. Another said, like me—even though she wasn't me—that she didn't want to take any chances.

Then the young boy ran up to Rex and me. NOT A GOOD IDEA! In that situation, where Rex is standing between me and the boy, Rex's instinct will tell him, The strange and obviously wild animal is now running up to your Alpha Dog and you might want to protect him. I held Rex tight and loudly said, "Do not touch my dog!" I repeated it over and over, until the boy finally veered away with a slightly wounded look on his face. Don't get me wrong. I do like children. I wasn't angry with the children, I was angry with the mother. I felt bad for the boy, but he was in a dangerous situation and his mother was the one who put him there. It was then that I spoke up and asked the woman to please leave and take her children with her. She looked affronted, as if I'd verbally slapped her, but when nobody came to her defense, she left.

Children should be taught to never approach an animal they don't know. They should be taught to always ask permission to approach a strange animal if the animal's owner is present. If the owner isn't present, they should never touch the animal. They should be taught to never make loud noises or sudden movements around an animal, and to treat them gently. And they should be taught that animals will protect their owners, their yards, their cars, and anything the animal thinks is their property, so they should never stick their hands through fences or car windows to pet a dog.

The SPCA and Humane Society offers courses to teach children and adults how to respect animals, understand their behavior, and how to avoid dangerous situations. In most locations they'll even come to your school or community center to give demonstrations, often free of charge. The more people are educated about animal behavior the less likely it is that people will be bitten or attacked by animals. Which means fewer animals will be put to sleep because of our stupidity.

I felt bad about getting so angry at the dog park today. Rex had a good time, but I left feeling stressed and upset. I was also worried that I was too harsh. It wasn't until I got home and looked at houstondogparks.org and saw that the city park rules specifically state that children under 12 aren't allowed in the dog park that I felt better.