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April 2011


my (our) books

Fool for Love When You Don't See Me

Someone Like You I'm Your Man

He's The One It Had To Be You

The Mammoth Book of New Gay Erotica Best Gay Erotica 2007

Best Gay Love Stories: New York City Best Gay Love Stories 2005

Three Fortunes In One Cookie The Deal


If you have any of the above books and would like them signed, mail them to:

P.O. Box 131845, Houston, TX., 77219.

Please include three dollars for return postage.

Send email to timothyjlambert@gmail.com

Warning: This blog may contain homosexuals which in the states of California and Maine have been alleged to destroy the sanctity of marriage. Read at your own risk.


recommended courses of action

Scout's Honor Rescue is an all-breed, no-kill, Not-For-Profit 501(c)(3) animal rescue organization committed to bringing courage, character and compassion to Houston's homeless pet population and making a positive difference in the lives of these stray and abandoned animals and the Houston community as a whole. 100% of every dollar donated goes directly to saving the life of a homeless animal.

Scouts Honor Rescue Inc.

locally known


maine AIDS alliance

global AIDS alliance


AIDS foundation houston

bering omega community services

frannie peabody center

Timothy's hair by Larry Henderson Hair Design.

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these are the days of our lives

Last year I was asked to submit writing for the ISO Calendar of Days, and since 2006 is allegedly over I thought I'd post the writing I submitted for those of you who never bought the calendar. Whether this is an added bonus or a punishment is entirely up to you.

The Agony, The Ecstasy, And The Liver Failure (Or, All About Deadlines)

A writer's best friend should be his editor. However, editors are crafty and know that writers procrastinate. Therefore, editors impose a deadline, a date by which a finished manuscript must be received so it can collect dust on the editor's credenza.

If you lose your mind and decide to become a writer, here are some ways to handle your impending deadline:

  • Have your best ideas while shopping for groceries, taking a shower, or in transit. Promptly forget them when you're home and your computer makes that start-up bong! sound. Play one hundred games of solitaire and lose every time.

  • Contact your writer friends. If they're not writing, spend the next few days conversing about the agony of not writing. If they are writing, spend the next few days self-flagellating while convincing yourself they're worthless hacks anyway.

  • Although they can be excellent sources for inspiration, avoid newspapers, magazines, and Web sites where you might stumble on book reviews and see that your writer friends are being published. Also avoid movies, where you'll see that your writer friends are having feature films adapted from their work or are writing screenplays.

  • Avoid Hallmark stores. If you enter one, a date will pop into your head. A holiday? Someone's birthday? An anniversary? No. It's your deadline. Proceed to liquor store.

  • Have a sudden burst of inspiration two months before your deadline and write. Reread the finished product and hate it. Realize that the jig is up; everyone's going to find out that you never went to college and that you're a hack. Get drunk. Submit the manuscript in the morning, because you can't afford to give back the advance.
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