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April 2011


my (our) books

Fool for Love When You Don't See Me

Someone Like You I'm Your Man

He's The One It Had To Be You

The Mammoth Book of New Gay Erotica Best Gay Erotica 2007

Best Gay Love Stories: New York City Best Gay Love Stories 2005

Three Fortunes In One Cookie The Deal


If you have any of the above books and would like them signed, mail them to:

P.O. Box 131845, Houston, TX., 77219.

Please include three dollars for return postage.

Send email to timothyjlambert@gmail.com

Warning: This blog may contain homosexuals which in the states of California and Maine have been alleged to destroy the sanctity of marriage. Read at your own risk.


recommended courses of action

Scout's Honor Rescue is an all-breed, no-kill, Not-For-Profit 501(c)(3) animal rescue organization committed to bringing courage, character and compassion to Houston's homeless pet population and making a positive difference in the lives of these stray and abandoned animals and the Houston community as a whole. 100% of every dollar donated goes directly to saving the life of a homeless animal.

Scouts Honor Rescue Inc.

locally known


maine AIDS alliance

global AIDS alliance


AIDS foundation houston

bering omega community services

frannie peabody center

Timothy's hair by Larry Henderson Hair Design.

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vanity kills

Ripped off from Greg Herren, because I have nothing better to do until the rinse cycle ends, so why not answer Vanity Fair questions?

What's your idea of perfect happiness? Not leaving the house.

What is your greatest fear? Leaving the house.

Which historical figure do you most identify with? Either Sisyphus or Rip Van Winkle. (But not Robbie Van Winkle.)

What trait do you most deplore in yourself? I'm easily distracted.

What is the trait you most deplore in others? Others are not me, and often don't find me half as brilliant as I do.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue? Moderation.

On what occasion do you lie? Sometimes I'll lie to be humorous. As in, "When I was young, we lived in a lobster trap." *pause* "I'm kidding."

What do you dislike most about your appearance? My parents did pretty well combining their genes, but I've been known to complain about my forehead and how you could advertise on it. But I hardly ever have to look at my forehead, so it works out well.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse? "That's funny. I'm stealing it."

What is your greatest regret? Regret is a waste of time. Time better spent sleeping.

What or who is the greatest love of your life? This is a very personal question. So I'll just say, "When I was young, we lived in a lobster trap."

When and where were you happiest? When I first saw words I'd written on a published page. It was a big "fuck you" to a lot of people who assumed I'd never amount to anything.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I'd be less offended by ignorant people who are never going to change.

If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be? They'd be wealthier.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would it be? My agent is shopping this idea around, so I can't tell yet.

If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be? This question is redundant. See above.

What is your most treasured possession? That little girl I inhabited for a brief time and forced to puke pea soup.

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? Republicans. Anne Coulter, specifically.

What is it you most dislike? Fox "news."

Who are your favorite writers? Oscar Wilde, Noel Coward, John Steinbeck, Ethan Mordden, Joe Keenan.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction? The Cheshire Cat. He knew when to leave.

Who are your heroes in real life? People who are aware that their actions affect other people, and then act in accordance with grace and kindness.

What are your favorite names? I try not to play favorites.

How would you like to die? Implosion. It's less of a mess.

What is your motto? "I can do anything."