timothy j. lambert

Photo Friday, Number 24. Theme: Eyes.

Lloyd.

Had a great week at Hanley Inc. today. The Big H and I watched some propaganda films today, something called Your Baby Can Read. The boss lady was totally into it. I was bored after the first five minutes. Then I remembered that I already can read, so I flipped through some magazines and said "Elephant!" every now and then. She seemed to accept my minimal participation. Afterward, we switched to cable and watched Rosemary's Baby. When Mia Farrow finally saw her demon baby and screamed, "What have you done to his eyes?" Hanley laughed loudly and kicked her feet over and over with joy. It's now my goal to have that be her first complete sentence.

For the past month there have been a series of product testers at Hanley Inc. I'm not sure from where they were recruited, but they're all small with limited vocabularies, so I'm guessing Alaska or Iowa. The first product tester--I'll refer to him as Christopher, since that's his name--has been around the longest and has an inordinate interest in all things video game. He's done extensive research in the field of Triscuits and Cheerios. Unfortunately, Hanley Inc. hasn't sunk its teeth into that market yet. The company is barely seven months old. It has no teeth. However, Christopher has proved very effective in making the boss lady laugh, which is time well spent, in my opinion. Another product tester, Skylar (I think that's how her name is spelled.), barely lasted a week at Hanley Inc. She was extremely capable and wise beyond her years, as most women are, but she was very chatty. When she wasn't talking she was watching television. I learned a lot about those Jonas boys while she was around. The last product tester, Baylor, arrived last Tuesday and left today. After his stint at Hanley Inc. he's off to space camp in Huntsville, Alabama, which can only mean he's a smartypants. I don't think he got much work done. He and Christopher played a lot of Halo most of the time. Apparently these people are all related to the boss lady in one way or another, which explains how they got their jobs.

Speaking of the boss lady, she grabbed my nipple today and twisted it while she was drinking her lunch. Now I can say I was sexually harassed at work by a baby.